Field Report
Date: Monday, April 8, 2013
Location: Cleveland Heights, Ohio
Subject: The elusive Fed Ex truck and its coveted parcel
- 7:00am arise and perform necessary morning ablutions with one ear always alert for sounds of impending delivery. Fed Ex trucks have been known to vary their routine significantly from one delivery to the next, and arriving early is a an effective way of avoiding capture.
- 7:30am construct a blind on the front porch out of patio furniture (utilize the bench cushion for padding, I may be here a while), rake, and snow shovel.
- 7:45am secure provisions and recording equipment, conceal myself, and settle in for the wait.
- 9:00am no sign. Growing weary of this watch. Am beginning to question this approach.
- 10:53am SUCCESS! My patience is rewarded. I have secured the parcel and the deliveryman has gone on about his appointed rounds.
- 11:10am time for the unveiling. The parcel proves to contain The Book. The Book is every bit as delightful as expected. Pages, covers, pictures, text, charts, all present and accounted for. It has that new book smell and a pleasantly substantial feel in the hand.
- 11:30am while documenting the results of my fieldwork, Barry Cat the Ever Valiant bravely investigated the packaging, declaring it to be delightfully crinkly and a suitable subject for further exploration.
If you had a dog, you would get plenty of warning when UPS is in the neighborhood. I sure do.
Alas, the kittens do not preform this service. Slacker kittens.
9:30am Borrow neighbors dog.
FedEx is the worst for their random delivery pattern. They drive me crazy! LOL! Enjoy your package when it arrives!
Maybe you should start doing radio collars on delivery men then release them back into the wild that way you could track their movements.
Sounds like a fun morning. Oh, the thrill of holding it in your hot little hands! Not to mention the thrill of crinkly stuff.
Cue rainbow dash level of excitement. Omygoshohmygoshohmygosh!!!!!!!!!!
How did you wait nearly 20 minutes to open it!? Tell me I’m getting that wrong!
Yayayay!